Old friends found and friendship rediscovered and reinterpreted.

Too often you start living life in a manner of continuous clichés and according to preconceived notions that you concoct for yourself. Life really starts to suck then. When you've all but given up on any hope for change, along comes a person (in my case, 'The Mad Hatter', but more on that later) or situation that sets in motion events that will turn your whole life around and invoke a completely new perspective on life; or help you rediscover one that lay dying slowly in the back of your mind and heart. My return to Hyderabad occurred under the most unceremonious and distasteful of circumstances. I hated the thought of being smoked out of my comfort zone and dreaded the prospect of returning to a city that I felt I had lost a relationship with. But as with most of the events and circumstances we dread in our life, this had a wonderful aside to it. I rediscovered my friends and rekindled my perspective of what friendship should be.

The first person to even get to know that I was back in Hyderabad was Deba (Debarati Dutta). The relationship that I had with Deba closely mirrors that shared by two close siblings. Aside from the fact that we got along so wonderfully we also shared an intellectual kinship. Combine the two and you have a relationship that can do nothing but blossom. When I met the rest of the guys through Praneet, Deba was one of the first to step forward and take charge of me :) She went out of her way to ensure I was comfortable and I will always be thankful and appreciative for such affection and care. I weighed 126 kilos back then and to say that I had a low self-image and confidence issues would be the understatement of the century. In a sense it was right that she be the first one that I re-established contact with. When she called there was no trace of any judgment or frustration at my not having kept in contact with her all these days. She simply asked me when I was free and told me that I was going to come out for a night with the guys; period. I was slightly uneasy because of my guilt but I agreed immediately because I sorely missed my friends. I was very apprehensive about how they would respond and the night would go on to prove how foolish I was :)

The next to contact me was patla kiran (Vajrala Kiran); another person who I was very close to. He greeted me in his typical fashion; mildly sardonic and utterly to the point :D He made sure that I wasn't going to bail out and then gave me directions to Varun's (Varun Jonnada, the telugu movie mega ultra power superstar!) house. I managed to get slightly lost and asked the guys to come pick me up. As I stood by the side of the road all the distilled emotions of apprehension, nervousness, excitement (and a little fear, i must admit) took hold of me. And then they came. With the same mixture of feelings I followed them back to the house and then it happened. The moment they stepped out of the car and met me was like experiencing a very physical epiphany. It was as if nothing had changed. I could have been meeting them after the space of a single day for all I could tell. There was no difference whatsoever. They received me with their usual rush of affection, good natured ribbing and camaraderie.

There was mota kiran (Vaibhav Arcot), Nireesh (Nireesh Reddy), Shiva (Shiv Charan Racharla), Deba, patla kiran, and of course, Varun. There was alcohol and food. There were video games. There were arguments and there were debates. There were discussions and soul searching. There were vindications and persecutions. There was laughter and joy. In all of this variety a singular thread of pure emotion ran through all of us; the feeling of friendship. I can imagine no place being more safe, comfortable, or plainly speaking, fun. When all of us get going on the alcohol chaos metastasizes quickly throughout the house. It resembles the veritable 'fish market' that every teacher in India talks about when referring to her classroom. But even in all of that chaos a sense of utter tranquility prevails and sitting back and listening to the various conversations, you feel as if you belong. That is not to say that everything was rosy all the time. Nireesh got a little too drunk, we had a slightly heated discussion with shiva, some neighbors complained halfway through the night, but all in all any negativity did not stand a chance compared to the atmosphere. As night turned to day people started slipping away slowly. Some went off to sleep and some went back home. And then the night was over and I came back home.

On the way I had a chance to reflect on everything that had occurred and I realized a few things. Any amount of time spent apart doesn't stand a chance against true friendship. The level of comfort and contentment you get with people who you respect and care about is so whole in itself that it doesn't matter where you are or what you do. When I was first introduced to the entire group by Praneet I marveled at the way they went out of their way to make an outsider feel comfortable and welcome. Two years in Noida seem to have dulled my mind and blinded me to this obvious truth. I feel foolish now to have felt apprehensive coming back to my friends. I should have known better. I do now. I am genuinely thankful to have a group of friends who are all good human beings. There is no malice in even a single one of them and the goodness shines through any shortcomings like a beacon of white light. When I was younger I always saw friendship as temporary bond of co-dependence. Now I realize that no amount of responsibilities, distance or hardships can do a damn thing to dent a good solid friendship. When I ask myself if this kind of friendship has a future the reply is quick and firm; how could it not? Here's looking forward to plenty of happiness and fun. Thank you guys for making my return to Hyderabad an occasion of some joy. I know that I can rely on you guys regardless. And oh, I love you Big Sis :D

(P.S: This will probably be the only emotional blog I will ever write)